The Long Island angry bagel guy— who went viral for a rant about bad dating luck for being less than 5-feet tall — sure is capitalizing on his newfound internet fame. Chris Morgan, 45, has been on a press rampage, and now, he’s created a Twitter account and is selling shirts, which bear his photo and “you’re not god or my father or my boss,” a line he said in the inciting video where he ultimately got tackled in a bagel shop. He’s taken to calling himself “Bagel Boss,” the name of the shop where he had the rant.
Here are all the insane details to know about the local internet wacko, should you ever have the misfortune of swiping right on him.
He lives in a minivan in the parking lot of a deli
The Post went looking for Morgan in Bay Shore, where a local directed a reporter by saying “If you’re looking for the short guy who is angry, he’s around the corner fighting with the homeless people.” Turns out, Morgan lives in a red 2008 Chrysler Town Country minivan that he parks at Nino’s Deli, where he uses the bathroom. He presumably stays there when not running his cleaning business, which is linked on his Twitter bio and boasts “professional staff.”
He apparently is getting more luck with the ladies now
“I got girls hitting on me I don’t even know,” Morgan, who is divorced, told the Post. On his new Instagram, he’s also posted photos of him with women, proving that he does in fact know a couple. In case you’re one of those people aspiring to partner up with him, Morgan also told TMZ what he seeks in a dream woman: “Educated. Not a greedy bimbo.”
That said, he doesn’t trust women generally
Shocking nobody, Morgan did not know what the word “misogynistic” meant, but after a TMZ reporter explained that it could mean feeling negatively toward women, Morgan admitted that he doesn’t trust “any” women. “Stop being so stuck up, materialistic. Stop getting offended if we go ‘oh you’re beautiful,’” he told TMZ.
He has a history of ranting in public and video-taping them
Though a person in the bagel shop uploaded the video, some people now think that the whole thing was a hoax because Morgan already had a YouTube page filled with videos of his rants. They had such winning, totally not-racist-at-all titles such as “Ghetto hoodrat cuts in front of me to use bathroom” and included calling Pakistan a “fucking Third World toilet” country. He’s now created a separate YouTube page. When asked whether it was all staged, Morgan said it was “not scripted.” “I’m using it to nullify bullying.”
Still, he thinks he’s a “modern-day Martin Luther King”
Like, for short people who get bullied. “They got shot because they wanted peace, which is what I want, so if that happens to me, so be it. I’m not changing. I’ve took enough and I’m sticking to it,” he said in an interview with Hot 97. He also admits to using the n-word — but don’t worry, he also has tons of black friends.
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